Ways to Diffuse an Argument When Going Through a Divorce
Trying to prevent an argument from happening while going through a divorce is like trying to stop the sun from shining. The fact is, arguments happen, even the tiniest of them when a couple is ending their marriage. When two people come to the realization that they are no longer going to be bound to a committed relationship, arguments and minor disagreements tend to arise more frequently.
Now, because divorces are recognized as some of the most stressful and emotional situations people go through, it is best to avoid confrontation at any level to prevent from adding more stress and tension into the mix. So, how do you defuse an argument that arises while going through a divorce? Clinical psychologist Lisa Firestone, Ph.D. offers some tips on how to do this, some of which we are sharing with you below [Source: Psychology Today].
Relax. Rather than allowing yourself to get all amped up after your spouse has said something to anger you, try and give yourself a moment to relax and gather your thoughts together. Whether this means walking away for a few minutes or removing yourself from the situation, take a few minutes to calm yourself down. The fact is, when you are calm, you and your spouse are more likely to resolve your issues and you are less likely to say something that could potentially impact your ability to obtain a successful outcome in your divorce.
Avoid lashing back. Whether you’ve been married for 12 years or 12 months, it is likely that you are aware of what your spouse’s trigger points are. Rather than say something you know is only going to cause the situation to escalate into something more serious, avoid making any comments you know could trigger the other person.
Respond warmly to your spouse. Although it may be difficult to do, Firestone suggests that you respond warmly when noticing your spouse may have grown upset. The reality is, if you are trying to resolve one or more issues that are associated with the divorce process (i.e. child custody, division of assets, etc.), you may have a difficult time coming to terms on that issue when the conversation transitions from a discussion into a disagreement. And if your spouse is already showing signs of hostility, it is best to not feed into that by responding with a negative or angry tone.
Communicate how you feel. Although you and your spouse are preparing to go your separate ways, it cannot hurt to communicate to him or her on how a particular matter makes you feel. Perhaps this will allow your spouse to understand your side a little better and can make getting through the divorce a little smoother for both of you.
Another way you can avoid an argument is by having a Hollywood, FL divorce attorney handle your case and communicate on your behalf with your spouse. If you know that arguments are inevitable, perhaps it might help to have a lawyer address certain issues to avoid running into any problems that could delay getting your divorce finalized. Hollywood, FL divorce lawyer Jodie Bassichis is one of the best lawyers in South Florida who not only handles divorce cases, but also other family-related matters as well.